Funny Ingame Mails

DeletedUser

Guest
This was posted in my tribe's forums. I've changed the names, obviously. :lol:

MR. A on 17.09. at 05:09
can you help im under attack please spare as many sowrd as yo can + any other troops

MR. B on 17.09. at 07:49
why wuld i help? hav u any troops left?

MR. B on 18.09. at 08:14
d u stl need help?

MR. A today at 03:39
nope just 750 scouts

MR. A today at 03:39
thats what he had

MR. B today at 03:41
oh right. who was it?

MR. A today at 03:42
um one minute

MR. A today at 03:43
wait why you attack me
 
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DeletedUser

Guest
The MuffinTroll Strikes again :lol:

MuffinSquasher today at 08:09
Complaint concerning [player]Deeznutzforu[/player]:

Deeznutzforu has a vulgar name as well as similarly foul names referring to male genitals used for his villages. His fetish for male junk is not something that kids using this site, or any decent person for that matter, need to be seeing while seeking the comfort and light entertainment that a browser game is supposed to provide.

In addition to projecting his indecent obsessions in the Tribal Wars game environment, this shady individual has exhibited an ongoing and uninterrupted urge to stalk & harass people on the Tribal Wars forums and has a negatively-charged posting history that extends almost throughout the full 24 hour cycle of a day. While this is scary enough from a human lifestyle point of view, according to the rules, stalking & harassment should not be tolerated especially considering that the behavior as described is continuous for most of each day.

Weak Spot today at 08:11
are you really that sad?

Weak Spot today at 08:11
what a freak :)

This message has been forwarded by Weak Spot.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Ohhh it's got so much better! Again taken from the tribe's internals, and names edited out (MR. B is in my tribe) :icon_biggrin:

MR. A today at 01:17
your not realy 99 years old

MR. B today at 02:11
no. im 21. lol

MR. A today at 02:17
i thought so

MR. B today at 03:18
na my girlfriends 21 i am 99 really i just try to keep it fresh with the youngins. i got lots of money so shes always there to mouche it outta me. its ok when i die iv written my will out to my chickens so she wont get any of it.

MR. A today at 03:51
realy your lieing

MR. B today at 03:57
no im not how do you think i find the time to play so much. my cock dont work anymore (even with viagra) and im barely mobile. that leaves me nothing more than tribal wars and slurpies.

MR. A today at 03:59
wow your realy trieing to fuck with me

MR. B today at 04:00
we got this biggest lie thing in the forum was trying to get a really good one on you before i nobled your village.

MR. A today at 04:03
what your going to noble me thats why you scouted me

MR. B today at 04:04
haha. thats the biggest lie i got you to believe now! haha

MR. A today at 04:05
oh you jerk

MR. B today at 04:07
well at least i got 1. haha what you up2. btw why you build such a huge amount of swords.? no one ever going to need that many.

MR. A today at 14:43
well good defence

MR. B today at 22:11
Rite makes sense

MR. A today at 22:13
yah soo you have an academy yet

MR. B today at 22:16
Na not yet only 20 smithy.

MR. A today at 22:57
why are you attacking me please dont

MR. B today at 23:00
its only a scout. its been ten minutes so i cant cancel it. sorry. j checking how much troops uv got. u shuld help me with an assault?

MR. A today at 23:02
dude that fucking sucks i just called a malitha what the fuck

MR. B today at 23:10
hahahaha. u shuld hav asked first. can u not cancel them? thats weak

MR. B today at 23:10
lol

MR. A today at 23:15
your not able to

MR. B today at 23:17
lol! now im going to get less resources when i cat and ram your village. weak

MR. A today at 23:19
whatever (_)


MR. A today at 23:55
you dident let me finish
!
(_)
/ \

MR. B today at 23:58
man you really confuse me ae. but not as confused as you will be in about 30 minutes.

MR. A today at 23:59
why did you attack me i thought only were sending scouts

MR. B today at 23:59
hahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

llanowar

Guest
llanowar77 today at 22:47
why?

zMachine today at 22:52
u attack an ally i attack u simple as

llanowar77 today at 22:53
ahhh so the 300 point guy who I thought had probably just dropped totally inactive is still there

and that confirms my suspicion that FFF and FFG must have been some family dynamic.

Whatever. Protect your 300 point guy. he'll get gobbled up by someone if he's that inactive.

zMachine today at 22:58
ye its called a ally and hope u got defence theres a op going on you


Well I guess its time for the war against family tribe to begin in earnest.

New Intel: Yep I better have tons of defense. Every attack incoming is at LC, Axe, or Swordsman speed. What ever shall I do?? I can't possible kill off every unit they sent at me can I??

Oh wait....Im a rim n00b so I must not understand how to dodge.....right.
 
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DeletedUser

Guest
Why are you getting all the attention? O:

I sent 1 random attack to him and I guess he got all scared...It was one scout and in response he sends three attacks(axe speed) and messages me and my tribemates...I wont block him because it is funny lol


MuffinSquasher on 21.09. at 20:31
I think it's funny that you filled your profile with all that stuff. That's the perfect place for it. Thank you.

Bye freak
 

DeletedUser

Guest
more cake

More cake:

guy1 today at 08:00
Look I know you are looking fir farms but please leave me alone, I have big plans on the way with my tribe we will be gaining back 20k points in the next few weeks and I would like you to be part of it as I like your agression in this game but you have much to learn about farming and growing quickly from that position, if you join my tribe there are a few of us who are tw experts and have been very succesful in the past and we would be willing to teach you :)

soomer today at 08:07
There will be cake again

guy1 today at 08:38
What do you meen ?

soomer today at 08:39
It's all your fault

guy1 today at 08:40
Why what did I do

soomer today at 08:44
This is your fault. It didn't have to be like this. I'm not kidding, now! Turn back, or I *will* kill you! I'm going to kill you, and all the cake is gone! You don't even care, do you? This is your last chance!

soomer today at 08:45
Look, you're wasting your time. And, believe me, you don't have a whole lot left to waste. What's your point, anyway? *Survival?* Well, then, the last thing you want to do is hurt me. I have your brain scanned and permanently backed-up in case something terrible happens to you, which it's just about to. Don't believe me?

Here, I'll put you on:
Strange voice: Hellooooooooo!

That's you! That's how dumb you sound! You've been wrong about every single thing you've ever done, including this thing. You're not smart. You're not a scientist. You're not a doctor. You're not even a full-time employee! Where did your life go so wrong?

guy1 today at 08:50
Well im 11 years old so my life has just started I've scored 149/155 in the top grammar school in the country which was the second highest Mark I've also got offered a place at another school with an acedemic scholarship so I'm not exactly stupid am I ?

soomer today at 08:55
Your entire life has been a mathematical error... a mathematical error I'm about to correct!

guy1 today at 09:00
How ?

soomer today at 09:06
We are pleased that you made it through the final challenge where we pretended we were going to murder you. We are very very happy for your success. We are throwing a party in honor of your tremendous success. Place the device on the ground, then lie on your stomach with your arms at your sides. A party associate will arrive shortly to collect you for your party. Make no further attempt to leave the testing area. Assume the Party Escort Submission Position, or you will miss the party.
 
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DeletedUser

Guest
Klaus Heissler on 21.09. at 17:23
Hell, it's quite interesting to see you grow. Anyhow, would you like to be my basher?

~Dev

Mangianime on 21.09. at 18:59
sorry we didn't understand english very good.. what a basher is?

snOilz & Mangianime

Klaus Heissler on 21.09. at 19:03
i hped u kno, i cpyied de mesage from w57 where i has 50k pop

Mangianime on 21.09. at 19:08
i have to join in your tribe or what?

Klaus Heissler on 21.09. at 19:23
u shnd be so arogant or u will get attaked by me white pony wariorz

Mangianime on 21.09. at 19:25
Pff i have an order of magical raimbows who are ready to attack you

Klaus Heissler on 21.09. at 19:27
i haz 1 axe ready to atak u

Mangianime on 21.09. at 19:28
ahahahah i have a sword to defend me but i haven't wall

Klaus Heissler on 21.09. at 19:34
i haz a black pony warior to kill ur sword and noble de village. hahhahahadhahahahahahaha

Mangianime on 21.09. at 20:23
How you can noble us whit only black warrior? U need the Nuclear

Pwnd

Klaus Heissler today at 12:24
I haz 2 blak wariorz now, ima noble u

Mangianime today at 14:19
i have do 11 kills and call dogs and they are killing your black warriors

Klaus Heissler today at 16:33
u racist bastad

Mangianime today at 17:26
im black D:

Klaus Heissler today at 17:27
u hate yoself?

Mangianime today at 17:33
no i love it

Klaus Heissler today at 17:34
u wana hug?

Mangianime today at 19:11
by you black warriors?

Klaus Heissler today at 19:11
no, my brown ponies.

Mangianime today at 19:14
your pony can hug?

Klaus Heissler today at 19:15
yes, they made out of 4 villagers u kno

Mangianime today at 19:19
good job and have you also gold fish who can hug?

Klaus Heissler today at 19:21
No :( Im getin thoze next wek, i haz cat that can hugz tho

Both sides are just kidding around if you didn't understand.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Cake 2

Continuing with a friend of the last victim - who is attacking me from 80 hours far :) Portal quotes make good sauce!

soomer today at 20:39
Look: we're both stuck in this place. I'll use lasers to inscribe a line down the center of the facility, and one half will be where you live, and I'll live in the other half. We won't have to try to kill each other or even talk if we don't feel like it.

soomer today at 20:45
Cake, and grief counseling, will be available at the conclusion of the test.

guy2 today at 20:46
Were you this wise when attaking my mates or this is something new?

guy2 today at 20:48
I recommend you to restart mate. Good luck

soomer today at 20:48
Yet you're smarter aren't you?

soomer today at 20:48
Do you think I'm trying to trick you with reverse psychology? I mean, seriously, now.

After he added another 80 hour attack to his last one...

soomer today at 20:49
Unbelievable. You, *subject name here,* must be the pride of *subject hometown here.*

guy2 today at 20:53
U r funny. When u restart, stay in touch;)

soomer today at 20:55
Well, you found me. Congratulations. Was it worth it? Because despite your violent behavior, the only thing you've managed to break so far... is my heart. Maybe you could settle for that, and we'll just call it a day. I g to happen.
 
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DeletedUser

Guest
....

MT420 today at 09:57
Step Yo game up cuz I come strong with the pimp hand

TheGunFlingr today at 14:41
haha, pimp it out dude

MT420 today at 17:00
lol ;)

Excuse me, neighbor... can I borrow some flour?

TheGunFlingr today at 17:12
only if i can borrow some sugar, im baking a cake

MT420 today at 17:22
You must know i'm coming?

TheGunFlingr today at 17:24
im a hell of a cook :D

MT420 today at 17:28
hahaha

ill have to send a scout before my spearmans make sure its save to eat.

TheGunFlingr today at 17:32
send the whole family, theres plenty for everyone :D

MT420 today at 17:37
Idk sounds like a set up to me..

wheres the beef?
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Adhd?

SkyHawkSpartan
everyone send spare troops to ---/200 send them for atack this guy is attacking my villages and all the vilages around me and i am getting very mad any resources will help me out too so send any spare resources and troops thsi guy has 929 points so send as many as possible fast


SkyHawkSpartan
ok this is adding onto my last message this is war on them and we can earn our tribe some war points who with me!

SkyHawkSpartan
ok here is the thing i have played this game before and on my other account i have 5,000 troops all together and so dont you dare change my privilages again please

SkyHawkSpartan
well i would like if oyu changed my privilages back and would oyu like for me to leave and join someone else and then attack you? i didnt think so?

SkyHawkSpartan
i have played this before for five years

SkyHawkSpartan
what have you done! first you take away my privileges and then you dismiss me really you will attack my village you may be older than me but that doesnt mean you are the boss of me you witch

SkyHawkSpartan
Really i dare you to attack my village i am a souless warroir

SkyHawkSpartan
and you will die because i will attack your village with my 500,000 troops all of them either heavy or light Calvary and you cant stop me and i dare no triple dog dare you to attack me

TattooHeart
OMG, not the triple dog dare!!!
I guess I'm just dead then, since you have all those troops.

My troops will be waiting at the gate with your milk and cookies :)

Sweetie, does your mommy know you're on the computer?

SkyHawkSpartan
and yes and i am not on a computer i am on my macbook air laptop! just came out and dont honey me!

SkyHawkSpartan
ought i would let you know that i am in the seventh grade and probably richer than you honey !

SkyHawkSpartan
ok fine i give im sorry for calling you a witch and everything else im very sorry can i rejoin please?

SkyHawkSpartan
and to prove it i will send you all of my remaining resources please i want to rejoin i am tired of arguing with you. please
 

DeletedUser100696

Guest
The Failure is strong with this one.

Warriorsblood on 01.10. at 18:18
Dear [player]Tuzain[/player],

I would like to Offer you a Fusion to my Tribe.
As my Tribe is currently higher than you,It could be usefull if we smelt our Tribes together to become one bigger Tribe.

My experience with Tribalwars is bigger than my points are,I have been the Leader/Finder of one of the Greatest tribes in the dutch tribalwars history.

Hoping to work together soon,
Greets [player]Warriorsblood[/player].

Tuzain today at 02:43
Thanks for the insult.

Warriorsblood today at 10:06
What do you mean with Insult?

Tuzain today at 10:10
You insulted me with that offer.

Warriorsblood today at 10:12
Sorry than,this was not my intention.
But would you like to Merge into our Tribe or not?

Tuzain today at 10:14
Facepalm

Warriorsblood today at 10:18
Thx for searching up that nice pic for me,but actually..Just so you know,with that kind of attidude you won't get far on TW..Sooner or later,you will understand why I say that..

You can better go to 'Setting' and click on 'Start over',then trying to do suicide..

I was trying to be Kind and Diplomatic,and you act like a pissed of kid in return?Guess you really are a pissed of kid in that case..

Tuzain today at 10:20
Facedesk

Warriorsblood today at 10:24
Guess now,you're a crying pissed of kid..

Tuzain today at 10:28
JumboTron Facepalm
 

Deleted User - 8912639

Guest
Hi BMC

I just think it's always funny when I talk to theweeboy.

theweeboy today at 02:46
ok everyone, [ally]DBB [/ally]is attacking and unlike [ally]DBFB[/ally], these guys mean business so here we go. We need Everyone in all our tribes to send their defensive troops to the front lines! here are the cities that need to be stacked for long term support

Support

[coord]318|376[/coord]
[coord]319|372[/coord]
[coord]317|367[/coord]
[coord]319|363[/coord]
[coord]319|356[/coord]
[coord]323|353[/coord]
[coord]332|356[/coord]
[coord]316|380[/coord]
[coord]313|390[/coord]


Everyone must contribute to stacking these cities!!! split ur forces and send a little bit to everything so every village gets an even amount of support. Thank you

[player]theweeboy[/player]

pressstart today at 02:51
Thanks again, [player]Jeiinosen[/player]! :)

This message has been forwarded by pressstart.

theweeboy today at 02:58
haha

theweeboy today at 02:59
u need to start picking a new person to pick on other than jeiinosen

pressstart today at 03:00
How am I picking on him? He keeps forwarding me these.

theweeboy today at 03:02
no hes not. hes not online :) that guy went to his friends house

pressstart today at 03:03
Omgz u so smrt u kik all duh spays. Y I styl gut massages?

theweeboy today at 03:04
cause there are many spies in tribalwars. I got all your messages too and your skype conversations.

pressstart today at 03:07
I ^dat duh profale
 
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