Funny Mails

[DeletedUser]

So, I'll do the starter:

Stalemate tried recruiting some Llamas, but we aint havin that! Llamas are a family and stick together (like glue - I know your mom also said that..)! :icon_cool:

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:37
Hello, you are one of the lucky few who have been picked to join my tribe, I have won 2 worlds before, 64 and 66, and I have a lot of experience

I also have a personal recipe, for staying at the top of the world for at least 6 months, but by then you will easily be able to keep it for longer

I am willing to share this technique that has been refined time and time again, with you

Stalemate

p.s, if you don't join, you shall become part of the group of people who I will take over eventually

Derp a derp llama Oct 24,2013 20:45
Im vegetarian can i still use this recipe? I also eat strictly kosher food only.

Derp a derp llama Oct 24,2013 20:46
I'm also out of salt can I still use the recipe? or should I go shopping?

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:47
I like your sense of humour would you like to join this tribe

I would promise that it will go far, but I already know it will anyway

Stalemate

Derp a derp llama Oct 24,2013 20:50
Your recipe calls for alot of canned llama spam I hope

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:50
believe me it does

Party Llama Oct 24,2013 20:51
Mate, heard you've got this great recipe.. Dyou need any salt or onions? Im at the groceries store atm

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:52
sorry, im experienced enough to not give my sacred guides out to those who
a)are not in my tribe
b)aren't a high enough postion
c) im only giving it when this world starts, so you have until then to prove your loyalty

Party Llama Oct 24,2013 20:52
How about bell pepper?

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:53
ar you making dupe acouunts, because 5 ppl with the word llama have sent me bakwas about food for my recipe


I hope that you are not making fun of me

Party Llama Oct 24,2013 20:53
BTW: Copy'n'pasting is quite stale, mate..

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:54
oh hahahahahahah I get it you are a dupe account

Party Llama Oct 24,2013 20:58
We are a Llama family! And what a shame you aint cookin for us

Crazed Llama Oct 24,2013 20:47
can u tell me your personal recipe

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:49
sorry, im experienced enough to not give my sacred guides out to those who
a)are not in my tribe
b)aren't a high enough postion
c) im only giving it when this world starts, so you have until then to prove your loyalty

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:49
I would like you to join my tribe though

Crazed Llama Oct 24,2013 20:50
is there any other way i can get the recipe?

my food keeps going stale

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:53
sorry, im experienced enough to not give my sacred guides out to those who
a)are not in my tribe
b)aren't a high enough postion
c) im only giving it when this world starts, so you have until then to prove your loyalty

Crazed Llama Oct 24,2013 20:54
i dont think i can join your tribe and i really need non stale food what can i do to get that recipe!!!

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:55
fine if you don't want to join my tribe go away and stop pestering me with those dupe accounts that will get you banned as you have the same ip adress

Crazed Llama Oct 24,2013 20:56
we arnt dupe accounts and i really need the recipe, i have 7 llama mouth to feed!!! they hate the stale food please give me the recipe!!!

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:57
you clearly are because you said " we are" so you are collaborating with the owners of other accounts that involve the word llama

Crazed Llama Oct 24,2013 20:59
look can you please give me the recipe the stale food is driving me nuts!!!

 

[DeletedUser]

Joseph Gordon Llama Oct 24,2013 20:51
I've heard that you possess the true secret to winning. I have heard it said, that your secret involves a "recipe." I am interested in knowing the full ingredient listing?

I've tried Cumin a couple times before, but I feel like that more just for start-up?

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:54
sorry, im experienced enough to not give my sacred guides out to those who
a)are not in my tribe
b)aren't a high enough postion
c) im only giving it when this world starts, so you have until then to prove your loyalty

Joseph Gordon Llama Oct 24,2013 20:54
HOW DO I PROVE MY LOYALTY?


If I leave my tribe I cannot spy for you!

Stalemate Oct 24,2013 20:56
you may prove your loyalty by joining this tribe, helping me recruit members, and organize forums

you can be my baron

HeHeHe

 

[MrRandomGuy]

Swanny0 today at 11:22

Greetings,
looking for some experienced players to join my tribe.If your interested please reply asap we have 3 allies however when the world starts i will change that most likely as having allies early on is not always good.We have member who can snipe and send trains accurately is 300ms.So this goes to single player or even tribes if your interested please let me know.And if you have a tribe with members already then possibly they could come to just ask me,
thanks for your time.
Swanny0

3 allies and the world hasn't even started yet

Fail

 

[DeletedUser113237]

Swanny0 today at 11:22

Greetings,
looking for some experienced players to join my tribe.If your interested please reply asap we have 3 allies however when the world starts i will change that most likely as having allies early on is not always good.We have member who can snipe and send trains accurately is 300ms.So this goes to single player or even tribes if your interested please let me know.And if you have a tribe with members already then possibly they could come to just ask me,
thanks for your time.
Swanny0

3 allies and the world hasn't even started yet

Fail

Thing i find funniest is theres a 100ms gap setting on this world so that would be 400ms as loyalty only drops between 25-35

 

[d4m0]

00:03:01.001
00:03.01.101
00:03:01.201
00:03:01.301

 

[ALessonInPointWhoring]

Thing i find funniest is theres a 100ms gap setting on this world so that would be 400ms as loyalty only drops between 25-35

Loyalty drops 20-35.

Who's lacking research again?

Not to mention it's 300 ms, not 4, as already shown in the post above mine.

Crawl back under your rock.

 

[DeletedUser]

Ooof burn!! :icon_surprised:

 

[DeletedUser]

I hope those were not the only funny mails in w72. where are others ?

 

[DeletedUser]

North West Oct 30,2013 22:41
</3


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 22:42
I'm not a fan of reality TV or your daddy.


~Snow


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 22:44
Joking, just wanted you to beg for my friendship


North West Oct 30,2013 22:45
Haha. Far enough, guessing you just going for the award to be honest?


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 22:46
Yup, I got the award 10 minutes ago and then began to remove people hehe.


North West Oct 30,2013 22:48
Yeah makes sense, never understood chasing that award but to each their own. So you play TW much before? I'm gonna guess yeah, seeing as you look like an alias


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 22:50
:O
How did you guess that!?


North West Oct 30,2013 22:50
I dunno! I'm some sort of genius mind-reader clearly!


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 22:51
Well I'll let you answer your question for yourself then


North West Oct 30,2013 22:51
Damn. Time to e-stalk you!


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 22:53
You'll never find out who I am. I've left my past behind. It's all about new beginnings.


North West Oct 30,2013 22:54
Yeah I figured that when I checked your forum account considering your skype matches this account name. Hmm. You haven't truly left your past behind, you're friends with Matt on the forums! That's my place to start :O


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 22:54
OK, you really meant it when you said you'd be stalking me. :S


North West Oct 30,2013 22:56
Lol. I just googled your name wondering if it was some sort of book/film/game reference or something and your forum account came up haha.


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 22:58
It's all my imagination, darling. I'm original


North West Oct 30,2013 22:59
Unlike me. Although the name isn't even originally to do with Kanye's kid. Came from lying to a fellow tribe member about the direction we started in, heh.


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:00
Lmao clearly. ____ loves the south-east
Who doesn't?


North West Oct 30,2013 23:01
Me. Always preferred the North for some reason. Don't like the south, south is all racist and stuff.


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:03
Here's something interesting about me. I used to play sports. Then I realized you can buy trophies. Now I'm good at everything.


North West Oct 30,2013 23:04
What sports? Although it sounds like some sort of metaphor for tribalwars and P2W to be honest.


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:05
Maybe- just a sec. I'm cle'a]ni.ng m'y ke]yb29oa;rd


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:06
Here's something else. I'm also proud of myself. I finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said 2-4 years. That's a big achievement.


North West Oct 30,2013 23:09
That's actually pretty funny. But congrats, how many pieces did it have?


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:12
Three hundred. Gosh, that's so much. People reckon I'm too patronising (that means I treat them as if they're stupid). What do you think?


North West Oct 30,2013 23:14
Damn. Get a career in comedy man, You could get dollar. For the record, I like being treated like I'm stupid. Makes me feel more intelligent when people treat me like I'm dumb, so thanks.


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:16
¡ǝɯıʇ ǝɯɐs ǝɥʇ ʇɐ sɹɐʍ ןɐqıɹʇ ǝsn puɐ puɐʇs-puɐɥ ɐ op ʎןןɐuıɟ uɐɔ ooʍ


North West Oct 30,2013 23:17
Hmmm when I said comedy I meant stand up, not stand on your hands.


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:18
My wife said I'm too immature and if I don't grow up it's going to erect a barrier between us. Ha ha ha, erect.


North West Oct 30,2013 23:25
HAHAHAHA.


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:26
Did you know statistically, 132% of all people exaggerate?


North West Oct 30,2013 23:28
I thought it was higher.


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:33
Ah I hear many things. I heard that there is scientific proof that birthdays are good for you... the more you have the longer you live.


North West Oct 30,2013 23:41
On the other hand, birthday's are in limited supply. So each one you have means you are more likely to die.


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:43
I reckon anti-wrinkle cream doesn't work. If it did, women wouldn't have any fingerprints.
Anyway I'll be off now. While I'm away so try not to make a fool of yourself.


North West Oct 30,2013 23:45
____ knows I'm a fool.


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:47
Oh... people think I suffer from insanity... but I quite enjoy every minute of it.


North West Oct 30,2013 23:47
That's the important thing


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:50
Finally, someone who understands "me".
But you still haven't answered what really matters? Who am I...?
I'll see you soon- hopefully.


North West Oct 30,2013 23:50
You're clearly Jesus.


Druskel Snow Oct 30,2013 23:51
I won't say anything. It's for me to know, and you to find out.

I like to entertain myself. I removed some irrelevant parts of this mail too.

 

[DeletedUser113267]

"I finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said 2-4 years. That's a big achievement."
I damn near pissed myself. Thank you for that.

 

[DeletedUser]

Leonidas s such a fool...

Leonidas: We may have won the battle, But they will win the war!Other 12 Spartans: Aaah... What?

Leonidas: I'm assembling an army to go to war with Persa I'm going to take them in the rear... and then I'm gonna reach around, and I'm gonna take them again from the front!

Leonidas: Adjust you sword boy, it's digging into my back.
Sonio: But I'm not wearing my sword.
Leonidas: [Pause.] Carry on then.

Leonidas: (picks up subway sandwich) No mayo? This is bullshit!

This has to be here.

 

[DeletedUser]

+1

 

[DeletedUser]

+1

you can give me a reputation point instead :icon_rolleyes:

 

[DeletedUser]

tribalbates Oct 29,2013 13:46
what do you want?


Llamaghini Oct 29,2013 13:48
A friend!


tribalbates Oct 29,2013 13:52
look somewhere else.

</3

 

[DeletedUser]

Oof so mean and cold-hearted! Ouch!!

 

[DeletedUser]

doejohn Nov 13,2013 02:25
you have scouts..


why didn't you farm that?

Spoiler

[report_display]http://en72.tribalwars.net/public_report/a2ce210f3706f7bc7540c63f784ec44c[/report_display]

WhatsHisNameNow Nov 13,2013 02:42
A number of reasons I guess. I have multiple farms like that and don't have enough troops to raid everything. And I don't scout my barb villages.


More for you


doejohn Nov 13,2013 02:44
lol good answer.


i doubt you have multi farms, just 'like' that though.


very far for me,random scout vil.


WhatsHisNameNow Nov 13,2013 02:45
Who you think made the dude restart


doejohn Nov 13,2013 02:45
no idea.


but if that were true...you'd farm it..


WhatsHisNameNow Nov 13,2013 02:55
Please do not call me out, I'm sure you didn't mean to, I have been very busy.

Spoiler

[report_display]http://en72.tribalwars.net/public_report/9700579ff596f70b0199712911aa698b[/report_display]

doejohn Nov 13,2013 03:06
fair point.


you got in there.

 

[zakipoo]

SInce ive started hitting DS, Hevinsbane to be specific.

She has been messaging me while iw as launching or attacking her, ive never replied at all... it goes in that order..


Mail topic : Nice Pick
[SPOIL]

hevinsbane Apr 27, 07:07
hello

hevinsbane Apr 27, 07:33
isent that the vamp of blade 2?

hevinsbane Apr 27, 07:48
so is this zak vlad or anather?
you can respond you know lol

hevinsbane Apr 27, 08:57
so are we good?

she thinks after her pathetic one nuke attack makes things good for us?[/SPOIL]


Mail topic: Nice move on Tower
[SPOIL]

hevinsbane Apr 28, 05:24
i have a few of my own

your in for a surpize

hevinsbane Apr 28, 05:32
17 hours?
ahh well

tower nailed your second chain any how

hevinsbane Apr 28, 05:45
now that was a close one

She tried to noble one of my village,.. Not even remotely close at all.

I nobled that village.
[/SPOIL]

Mail topic: Nows your chance
[SPOIL]

hevinsbane Apr 28, 05:53
press the attack

[/SPOIL]

Mail topic: They does not get closer than this
[SPOIL]

hevinsbane Apr 29, 06:10
[report_display]http://en72.tribalwars.net/public_report/a63df3be813e00a14ee16cc0b68576ca[/report_display]

Nobled that village too
[/SPOIL]

Mail topic: geten slpy
[SPOIL]

hevinsbane Apr 29, 19:38
Brettonia tomorrow at 05:22:04:997
Strongglen tomorrow at 05:22:08:650



4 second gap

i dunt need to kill all three nukes just the one and you gave me a gap from hell to fit it in


surprize!!!!!

yeah coplayer launched nuke 4 seconds too early, big deal. lets see what she does.[/SPOIL]

Mail topic: [Fwd] here have some troops
[SPOIL]

kirbie Apr 29, 21:59
looks like you got whats coming to you. ahhhh did you lose your little villas? dont worry i will help. help get rid of you at least.

and hev...you misspelled your own damn name. get a spelling check would you?

here have some troops from me to you.

hevinsbane Apr 29, 22:13
ahhhh you do love me

sending bashers?
friend his attacks land after yours so your a bit backwords on how this works

well hill eather 1 kill your troops
or 2
i snipe your chain killing 1 nuke and a few nobles thin dodge his simple little ars


planning is a good thing man
zakipoo your better thin this

This message has been forwarded by hevinsbane.

i never asked anyone.
[/SPOIL]

Mail topic: Press i must say
[SPOIL]

hevinsbane May 01, 00:07
there is no sarcasum in this

I'm glad your the one attacking me
i feel pride in knowing that i held back your forces
that gained this much od and even returnd fire on a few villas

you have erned the villas you have taken

this girl still has some fight in her
but in the end i'm glad i had a strong foe

hevinsbane May 01, 01:14
lol you could have dun that before you lost a mill od wortha troops?

eather way
i'm not out yet

yea ill loos some but youll loos some troops as well

[/SPOIL]

she seems mad in the end?
Seems like a fish gasping for air,.. you know its not helping. :icon_cry:

 

[zakipoo]

LOL i had to share this.

dude keeps eating my farms, scouting my 2 villages repeatedly so i gave in and started faking and nuking him.
and as soon as i was done launching, ii received this message.

ElfieZH Jun 29, 15:45
C'mon big boy - with a regrettably small head, and it shows ;-) . I am ready.


Press Delete Now Jun 29, 15:52
knck knck whose thier, me taekin ur vilalges lol gg.


ElfieZH Jun 29, 15:53
Dream on, it is good for you, son.


ElfieZH Jun 29, 15:54
Can you just please stop "lolling", as it is so very unattractive and uneducated.


Press Delete Now Jun 29, 15:57
D...d...d...daddy ??


ElfieZH Jun 29, 15:58
No, just another intelligent person. Not like yourself, clearly.


Press Delete Now Jun 29, 16:01
LEL daddy yer so funneh!


ElfieZH Jun 29, 16:04
Let's see how it goes. Even if I got nobled, it is water over a duck's backside.


Press Delete Now Jun 29, 16:08
On a serious note, You are being evicted from K-84, I am sending some people over to help you relocate to an area best suited for your abilities, you don't have to pay for the service, it is completely free, But tips are accepted.


Have a pleasant day.


Press Delete Now.


ElfieZH Jun 29, 16:10
P**s off, my dear.


Press Delete Now Jun 29, 16:12
LOL so no tips?


ElfieZH Jun 29, 16:15
No, thank you very much for offering a service.


Can you do anything but stupid "lolling"?


Press Delete Now Jun 29, 16:18
lolno


ElfieZH Jun 29, 16:19
Shows you caliber...


Press Delete Now Jun 29, 16:20
lolumad


ElfieZH Jun 29, 16:25
Thank you for the compliment. Yes, I am glad to be mad.