Diary of a pirates life

DeletedUser

Guest
Kiwi..... ye need to remind people of some of the less gay happening on ye ship... and nay bring me pure and innocent self into it.

<<< checks parts ot make sure Hater nay do vile things to them :(
 

Varian Gabria De Cerna

Guest
Aye, Travis, we ALL know yer not innocent...in fact, quite the opposite. It was ye who suggested the "golden party," to which the ONLY reason ANY of us obliged was due to the fact that ye said the world "gold" and...us being pirates...well we like gold! Only then did we realize what yer TRUE intent was, but it backfired, that's why ye smelly like a mixture of goat urine and Kiwis vomit! Poor, poor soul Kiwi is, misjudged, yet still as sinister as Capt'n and I.

Now get to work ye useless scrub!
 

DeletedUser

Guest
NAY.... Liezzzzzzz

This nay happen... go read kiwis diary.... that nay e'er happen
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Yes, but the glare from the dome is kindof mesmerizing. And you have to admit that it's not a completely unreasonable response to anything coming from RUM. We're barely controlled violence and smut bubbling out into the TW forums to infect the minds of the sheeple who inhabit this sad excuse of a repressed world. We are not unacceptable because of our violence and rampant sexuality but rather because we represent that which so many hide from for fear of being themselves.

There is no freedom when you toil under the tyrrany of the self image. Even this sad attempt to diminish the efforts of our dear brother is little more than a shield raised up against the possibility that something different might have value. The unknown is not to be feared but rather to be embraced and explored for how else would we defeat it but my making it known.

It is our duty to open the door for the lemmings of this world to walk through and evolve into something greater than just another cog in the wheel. Every day I find myself having conversations with "ordinary" people who have their own stories to tell. So rarely do we realize the young man bagging the groceries has a life beyond that fleeting interaction. And not only a life but one with unique and marvelous experiences. Every moment in this world breathes life into yet another story.

I do not advocate for true anarchy. That kind of freedom is nothing more than a change in who is being oppressed. Rather an enlightened hedonism wherein we experience for the sake of life without unreasonably infringing on the experiences of another. It's not that hard to work together at this people. Get on it.
 

DeletedUser

Guest
So as many now may know the Cap’ns compass pointed to the East, there be a large body of water there that be a fine Sea for pirates to sail in. The fleet be divided with each sailing to his or her own point on the map in preparation for the broadside to be fired, bloodthirsty crew one and all have the red mist but all know the folly of firing the canon too soon or too late and the foul mood it puts the officers into

This lads ship be a way from the action but that evil Lady Cap’n TheWickedWitch takes a pity on me and gives me a small ship from a pirate that fell to Davy Jones to command and shows me on the map where I should be a pointing the canon. When she points out I be holding the watch she lent me Upside Down it did make a lot more sense to me ears

I sail as hard as her tattered sails allow before bringing her into the wind and dropping the canvas laying her broadside on to the enemy, the thick sea fog has covered our approach as the Cap’n said it would then the sun burns it off and the enemy ships lie a mere short fuse away, the panic on the decks upon sighting the horrible mass of the RUM!! fleet warms the cockles of even a black heart. The rabble I have as a crew chock the canon wheels then upon the signal we light the twine and cover our ears. The roar of canon fire is something to behold, ships shaking and rolling under the recoil a massive plume of gunpowder smoke has barely left the water before the second volley. As usual the first has dismasted the enemy ships, decks littered with splintered wood and torn fabric along with the broken bodies. The second crashes into the hull of the ships, shattering the planking, smashing out bulkheads and causing terrible havoc on the lower decks

Then the black canvas fills the sky and the fleet sails into the mass of wounded ships and the boarding parties heave the grapnels laying themselves alongside before the cutlass wielding hellions flood the enemies decks. This lad however has no more business here, back to his own ship goes he
~
Soon the stories of murder and plunder filter back to the rest of us pirates holding station should we be needed there or elsewhere, it seems TheRiverStyx and The Biggest Hater cut a swathe through the enemy fleet, capturing many a fine ship with the plunder to boot. It be said Hater mistook a freshly plundered keg of chilli powder for one of gunpowder and upon snorting it was driven fair out of his mind extracting a terrible vengeance on the opposing rabble
~
Smartguysgcs has taken a liking to the poor turtle, his deck is littered with the carcasses of the clueless creatures. Many a cauldron of soup has been a brewed in his galley, or as Harrybeth1 did say, the lads galley be full of soup, which I not be sure is the same thing
~
I was given some foreign smoking baccy by the ever generous Magnoliaqp, it be lot different from my usual offering, I found myself talking gibberish and carving effigies of the magnificent bosom of TheRiverStyx. She seems not too aggrieved by the carvings as she only showed me the palm of her hand around my ears instead of the oft dealt fist and boot. Maybe her foot is still tender
~
That scoundrel Rammsteiner has been changing ships again, that fella seems always to land on his feet and now has a fine fleet to command. The way he talks that irks me so must be music to the right ears indeed. He did allow me to sail his last ship a little but my wits did leave me seeing me sailing in a never ending circle and proceeding towards the intended target nowt at all. He did say I could have another attempt some time but I also overheard him saying it would only be after the toredo worms eat his brain, I guess it may still be a possibility then
 

DeletedUser

Guest
Ye should see the pot me has a brewing...... me getting all the spices just right before me goes to slay some tuttles Muhahahahahahahaha
 

DeletedUser

Guest
If it annoys rober even in the slightest I'm sure the lad will be delighted to contribute again :)
 

DeletedUser

Guest
The lad sat watching his ship lie stagnant at anchor in the lagoon. She was a hardy vessel, he had been handed command with her in bad shape, rigging in tatters, worm infested planking and most of her canon rusted solid

His former ship had been a small lass but up for any fight she had sailed into, done him proud she had but when he was washed overboard amid a battle when a storm struck he had watched her shot to pieces by the rest of the pirate fleet to save her falling into enemy hands, he had wept to watch her go but as his cap’n had told him, such was life on the sea

As his boots hit the deck of his next charge he knew it would take pure hard toil to get her in shape, many a midnights passing found him working on the canon, measuring the shot, weighing the powder and after many a week on ‘t hard once again her hull was solid, her canvas stitched and the paint glistening

He had sailed her into many a skirmish only to watch the opposing ships take the canon fire heavy and the sailors abandon into the sea. Then the unspeakable had happened to the fleet ‘o mercenary and buccaneers, ships were lost without a trace, the cap’ns ship found without a helmsman and soon they were at each others throats

Another fleet ‘o bloodthirsty heathen was found but it was discovered comrades over pints ‘o rum not necessarily be comfortable comrades when the canon be roaring and so the band sailed into a battle of their own making shipmates at each others throats, promises made and broken until finally all the ships had set their sails high and gone where the winds took them

Some had found new flags to fly over their ships as they went about their bloody trade, some sailed off to places as yet undiscovered and some simply turned the canon to blow holes through their own hulls to shake hands wiv Davy Jones, the lad had found himself in the company of some true shipmates however all was not as it seemed and many a cap’n was found wanting when a firm hand was needed at the helm, preferring the soft targets rather than a proper challenge and now the devious methods of such and the persistence of the pursuers had seen yet another fleet dispersed and now he found himself sitting on this sand looking at what he had built and wondering what the future may hold for the both of them

But as any true sailor finds himself doing, his eyes also ran to the horizon, sweeping the line that divides ocean and sky seeking some ship to sail into view, either friend or foe no matter to him but some sign of what his destiny may hold for him was what he seeked
Lo and behold at that very moment there be a cry from the masthead, the boy Nato had long since departed but the new charge hollered at the top of his lungs

“There be a cluster of sails and if my eyes not deceive me Skipper it be flying the Jolly Roger above the laundry !”

The lad jolted to his feet and strained his sight to see what the boy be declaring to be so but it was many a minute before the skeleton of a rig became apparent to him, the wind blew in his face and so it carried the mystery ship quickly into view and there was no doubt a black flag flew at the head of the mast, there be only one insignia emblazoned on that to be sure and it made his heart sing to know what it would indeed be

Soon it hove into view proper and he recognised it from days gone past, the ship of a true shipmate long since departed into Davy Jones’ clutches and he winced at the thought. It be the enemy with a new stead attacking him again ? But the outline of the figure behind the wheel was vaguely familiar, it be someone he knew, the matter was just who that be...
 

DeletedUser

Guest
ARRR!!! it been said that many have sunken ta da depths o' davey alongside da pirate pearl! and with'er risin, da many risen again! yer spirit lives on ye scurvydog!!!!

think if'n we evar see a pirate blog, kiwi should be da author!!!!
 
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