Could you please clairify what "DIY" stands for?
It typically means "Do It Yourself", but it is obvious you will need than the group of you to accomplish this monumental task despite all the "tools" within your tribe.
So I picked up this manual to see what I could find out about you kids
Unfortunately, it was in some sort of horribly poor written grammar that I could not understand. Something about "points > troops" and instructions about attacking with swords because in real life swordsmen were better soldiers than tree choppers? I was also baffled by the "pray to the unicorn" reference...
The back cover page is a nice family portrait:
Not sure why you picked the red dresses, but ok?
We've dealt with fatties before, and we'll deal again it appears.