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WarPig productions presents:
Friends, family and ..... you lot.
Welcome to the first instalment of WarPig productions.
We are here because our tale, spoken to many a child as they drift to sleep, has been tainted with sweetness, with kindness and with love.
We did send a little piggy to the market.
We did allow one to stay at home.
We did permit another to eat roast beef.
Another we forced to starve.
The final piggy did indeed return home.
However, the devil is in the detail, so please indulge us. Allow us to share with you, the true story behind this fantasy tale .......
It was a warm, April day on world 112 and our army of piglets were in desperately in need of food. Alas, there was little food to be found. The Big, Bad JheeeZ kept eating it. So, clad in armour and weaponry, we sent a little piggy out to market.
This piggy listened, as he hunted for food. He overheard rumours, tales and facts. He discovered, to his disgust, that the big bad JheeeZ wanted to put some bacon on the plate!!
This little piggy could not have that. Oh no! Revolted by their evil plan, the piggy marched back home (still clad from snout to curly tail in armour) to report this nefarious plot to the leader of the pack.
This villainy could not be allowed to stand. The leader of the pack ordered another little piggy to arm himself and march to the edge of their homeland. To stay at home. To guard, to protect and to give his life for the farm.
Two other piglets were sent out for further information, that would help lead to a decision on where best to find food. Cloaked in metal with axes strapped to their backs, the pair set out to explore the world around them.
One went south, west and north. He found nothing ready to be eaten, and by the time he returned home, he was half starved. Food was in short supply on his travels and back home!
The other piglet, however, explored the east. There, he discovered land ripe for the taking. Land owned by the Big, Bad JheeeZ. He prepared his knife and fork, knowing that a prime slice of beef could be his for the taking.
He called the leader of the pack, telling him of this land, tainted by betrayers, liars and manipulators, that would provide them with all the food they needed for their army of war pigs to feast for eternity.
He then returned home ......
But alas, the story was not over yet. For the WarPigs still needed their food. And the Big, Bad JheeeZ was going to give it to them. Willingly or not.
And so, the Pigs that War, did indeed, go to war .....
Just in case you have no idea what's going on, WarPig declares on the JheeeZ Family.
May the best pig win
